So you’re single and beyond ready to mingle but it seems like guys you want don’t even know you exist and never pick up on your hints.
How can you get quality guys to see you and go after you? Read on for guaranteed tips and tricks to attract a man and have him chasing you. It’s more simple than you think.
How To Get A Guy To Notice You
It may seem like the only way to get a guy to notice you is big boobs and platinum blonde hair but I promise it’s not true. The real way that girls get guys to stop and take notice is through simple body language.
Having the right body language can make you more desirable than anyone else. Conversely, bad body language can turn the most beautiful woman into someone that nobody looks at twice. Just look at Beyonce.
The best thing about this is that guys can’t tell the difference between a girl who looks good because of her symmetrical features and perfect teeth and those that have simply mastered posture and body language. All they see is a slammin’ hottie.
There are a few simple things that can make you more attractive instantly.
- Point your torso and toes towards him to to give him a subconscious cue that you’re interested in him.
- Tilt your head forward slightly and look up at him. This mimics the view he’d get if you were much shorter than him which is an evolutionary trick that will make him more attracted. Just be careful of the double chin!
- Uncross your arms! Crossed arms make you look closed off and uninterested, not to mention more masculine.
For more long term body language improvement, strength training and yoga can improve your posture, making you look more healthy and confident.
Ask for his help
Whether you need help opening a jar, building Ikea furniture, or explaining the rules of pool, this is a great way to get closer to him.
What you choose should depend on your relationship. If it’s a guy at the bar, ask him when closing time is (yes, it can be this simple). If he’s in IT at your work, getting help using Excel makes sense.
Asking for help lets you approach a guy, it gives him the opportunity to feel like your hero, and it doesn’t put too much pressure on the conversation. The more masculine you make him feel, the more he’ll desire you.
But be careful not to ask something too obvious. You don’t want him to think you’re stupid.
Dress for him, not your girlfriends
While your trendy giant sunglasses and Hermez bag may be cool to your friends, they mean nothing to him.
From an evolutionary perspective, men are attracted to bare skin and soft round shapes. Choose the area of your body that you like the most and show it off! Neck and shoulders are ideal because he can still see them when you’re having a conversation up close.
Another tip is to wear your hair down and grow it out. Long hair has been biologically associated with fertility so this will get his mind on mating.
Catch His Eye
This is less about being appealing and more about giving him the opportunity to talk to you. It can be hard for guys to approach attractive women.
If you give him an opening the chances of making that connection go way up.
This means giving him something to comment on or compliment. A shirt with a band on it, some funky jewellry, a water bottle from your college, the book you’re reading: these will all invite comments and get the conversation going.
What you’re doing here is giving him a way in.
How To Make Him Want You
Getting a guy to notice you is just step one. It’s all for nothing if you can’t make him want you. I’ll go over some foolproof tips to make him stop staring and start going after you.
Simple ways to be more attractive
If you focus on increasing your overall appeal instead of focusing on attracting one specific guy, you’ll be able to get any guy you want. Plus, if he sees that suddenly no one can keep their eyes off you, he’ll start getting jealous.
You don’t need to be someone else to make yourself more attractive to him. I’m going to focus on tips that have nothing to do with your appearance that will make you more attractive to not just him, but everyone around you.
Stop being boring
This is easier said than done but it’s so important. Guys don’t want to date a boring woman no matter what she looks like. If you’re wondering if you might be boring, you are.
“It’s better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring.”
– Marilyn Monroe
Don’t worry, there are many things you can do to be more exciting to men through simple changes to your own routine.
First off, boring isn’t something you are, it’s something you do. We’re all boring at certain times in our life whether it be because we’re too focused on work, we’re stuck in a rut, or we don’t have anything propelling us forward. Shake things up!
With this in mind, get out of your comfort zone as much as you can. Try new things. Instead of staying in on a Friday night and doing your laundry, go out and paint the town red.
What’s something crazy you’ve always wanted to do? Whether it is skydiving, going to Vegas, or volunteering at a soup kitchen, do it!
While it may be hard, it will breathe life into your day-to-day and before you know it you’ll have crazy stories and unique experiences that will have him clamouring to learn more about you.
Make him remember you
There are a lot of people out there. Think of how many people you’ve met this month, this year. Do you remember their names? Do you remember what you talked about? Probably not. Who are the people you do remember and why?
The trick to having a memorable interaction isn’t about wearing a funny hat or throwing a drink in his face (although that would probably work). It’s about being present, being engaged and having a real interaction.
The people we just have small talk with aren’t the ones we remember. With that in mind, try to ask questions that are open-ended and really listen to their answers.
Even if you start by asking about his job, dive deep into how and why he does what he does. Show interest and keep asking questions. Don’t be afraid to get personal. It’s better to risk offending than risk being forgotten. You never know what you might learn about someone if you just ask.
And if it’s a conversation that he’s not used to having, it’s something that he will remember for a long time after it’s over.
Forget being mysterious. A study recently published in Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences shows that we are attracted to people whose emotions we can easily understand.
This means that if he can’t tell how you’re feeling, he won’t be as attracted to you. So don’t focus too hard on playing it cool. Excitement, happiness, and passion are all attractive. Men prefer women who are more than just blocks of wood.
This doesn’t mean burst into tears or shout from the rooftop but don’t be afraid to express your true feelings about a topic, a situation, or even about him. We often try to keep our emotions hidden because we don’t want to seem like we’re ruled by our feelings but if you do it right, letting him in can be a powerful attractant.
Don’t Put Him On A Pedestal
It often happens that when you meet a cool, handsome guy you really elevate him in your head. Before you know it you’re so nervous around him that you can barely remember your own name. You get all flustered and pretty soon he’s gone.
You need to be going into every interaction with a guy asking yourself the following question: “Who is this guy?” It’s easy to assume a guy is amazing simply because he’s hot but if you can control your hormones you’ll often realize that this guy is nothing more than a pretty face.
You can only find out his true value by having a genuine conversation and interaction with him.
Remember: you don’t even know this guy so don’t let him control your emotions.
What you need to do is think of how many other guys there are out there. Think of five men you know that are more attractive, more desirable and just plain better than he is.
This will make him immediately less intimidating. This is called the principle of abundance. Put simply, you aren’t going crazy over one piece of pizza when you know there’s an entire buffet right beside it.
If you can keep this in mind, you’ll project the sense that you have options. Guys will able to tell that you’re not attached to any one guy but open to the right guy and they’ll want to be that guy to be them. The more choosy you are the more guys will rise to the occasion. Having high standards makes you more desirable.
Put yourself in a position of confidence
We all act differently around different people and in different situations. It’s only natural. If you talk to your dentist the same way you talk to your best friend, you’re a weirdo.
At a family barbecue you’re more open, funny, and bubbly than say, when you’re on a bus with a guy in a trench coat.
This is information you can use to your advantage. Think of situations where you feel happy, at ease, and confident. It’s those times that you’re able to have meaningful conversations, crack jokes, and feed that positive energy back into the people around you. You want guys to see this version of you.
Maybe it’s at the gym after you put in a good workout, at brunch with friends, or when you’re talking about movies.
You can’t necessarily meet a guy at brunch with your friends but you can go walk through the park afterward and carry this inner confidence with you.
If you’re a fitness nut, put yourself out there and take a coed class.
If you love gourmet cooking and know a lot about it, take a cooking course and strike up a conversation with a guy there.
If a guy sees you at your best, he’ll want to be around you more. And the guys who are attracted to your passions are the ones you want.
Understanding Men: What Men Want
Men want certain things out of a woman, and I’m not talking about sex. These are things that men need from a long term partner if they’re going to stick around.
Men want to feel needed
If he doesn’t feel like you need him, he’ll feel unnecessary, replaceable, and like he’s not a real part of your life. Don’t be a burden but ask for his help when you need it, let him drive the car, or look after you when you’re sick. The primal need to care for a mate creates that strong bond that sustains a relationship. This is true for both men and women.
Men want to feel validated
Make him feel good. You need to build your man up rather than knocking him down. Make sure to regularly provide positive feedback and compliments. Thank him for doing nice things for you. There’s nothing wrong with pumping up his ego every now and again.
Make sure you’re being specific and accurate. If he’s got the body of a potato, don’t go on and on about his rippling abs. Really look at him objectively, see what makes him special, and shout it out. If you can’t find anything to praise him for, you need to find a new man.
Men want to feel secure
Stability is an important part of a relationship. Just like women want a guy who is dependable and solid as a rock, men look for consistency in their partners.
This means having your life together. He wants to know that if you make plans, you’re going to be there on time. While you being flakey and chronically late don’t have anything to do with him, he’s going to take it as evidence that you’re either not interested or inconsiderate.
Men want excitement
This one is more straightforward. They need to be attracted to you. This is a cold, hard truth. You may be able to get a guy to sleep with you but if he’s not attracted to you, he won’t be there the next morning, much less going forward from there. If he’s not attracted to you, he’s not the guy for you.
But excitement is about more than just physical attraction. He needs to feel that electric spark when you’re around. We’ve all been around people who seem amazing on paper but in person there’s just nothing there. It’s a primal thing that you can’t fake.
Keeping him excited is partially about your connection and partially about what you do to keep things interesting. If your only idea of a fun date is Netflix and a giant bag of cheezies, then you need to step up your game. You don’t have to take him on a balloon trip around the world or anything. Being exciting is just about giving him the occasional surprise.
If you can keep him guessing then he’s going to be excited to see you again.