How To Get Your Partner To Try Something New In Bed

Sometimes when you’re in a relationship, things can get a little … well … boring in bed. Regular sex just isn’t cutting it for you anymore. Should you feel bad about it? Of course not — this type of stuff happens all the time in relationships.

However, it’s important to not get too complacent … spicing up things in the bedroom can have a massive positive impact on the relationship as a whole. So put in the effort!

Start By Talking About It

The first thing you can do to spice things up is to just open up the lines of communication. Talk with your partner. Ask about a weird fetish that he/she has. The thing is, you have to be sexually open as well. 

If you want to spice things up, then going out of your comfort zone can be helpful. So just ask your partner if he or she has had a strange fantasy.

Tell them to be 100% open about it.

Whatever your partner says, make sure that you’re understanding about it. Don’t make fun of them or laugh. If you do this, it will be unlikely that your partner will open up to you about this kind of stuff in the future. What you need to do is listen and again, be open.

On top of this, make sure you help your partner alleviate any fears. Sex + fear doesn’t go together. You need to make sure that you’re both comfortable about the whole thing.

Be Spontaneous

Second, another thing you could do is just spring it on them! If you know that your partner is just going to outright say “no” to everything, what you can do is just try something a little more adventurous in bed.

Buy some toys and gauge their reaction. Start small … don’t just magically pull out a giant whip from the drawer. You want to spice things up, not terrify your partner.

A really easy way to ease your partner into something is to dress up differently. If you’re a woman, dress up in a cute maid’s outfit. If you’re a guy, maybe take the time to really dress up right now and take your girlfriend out on a hot date! It doesn’t always have to be chains and leather.

A Few Drinks First?

Third, try drinking some wine! It’s been proven that alcohol lowers inhibitions. So take advantage of this and see how adventurous you can be.

Finally … watch some porn together! Who doesn’t like watching porn? This is a great way to expose both of you to some really adventurous stuff. Show your partner a couple of videos that you really enjoy watching. You never know, you partner might just have the same fetish!

Good luck.

Jessica Raymond

Jessica Raymond, BSc, is LoveLearnings senior editor. As a relationship coach, Jessica has helped hundreds of men and women achieve their relationship dreams. Whether it’s finding your one true love or simply charming someone on a date, Jessica's got your back! In her articles, she reveals little-known, psychological tips that will make even the coldest person chase you around like a little puppy.