After a rough breakup, it can feel like you missed your one chance at happiness.
But the truth is that oftentimes a breakup isn’t the end. In fact, studies show that upwards of 60% of couples have broken up and got back together at one point or another.
So let me tell you’ll know that you and your ex are meant to be together.
Signs You And Your Ex Are Meant To Be Together
So, let’s get into it. Here are the ten signs that tell you that you and your ex are meant to be, starting with number one…
1. Your family likes them and vice versa
Family is so important and it can have a huge impact on a long term relationship. So if you get along with their family and they get along with yours, you should seriously consider giving things another shot.
Family can be a source of friction or it can be a source of strength and connection for years to come. Not only that, but it’s a great indicator of compatibility between the two of you.
As we all know, we tend to get more similar to our parents as we age so if you know you get along with that version of your partner, then it’s not going to be a huge shock when you find they’ve become a little more like their parents than they were when you first met.
2. You’re still connected even after the breakup
I often advise my clients to go No Contact with their exes. This means no phone calls, text messages or in person meetups for at least 30 days following the breakup. If you want your ex back, this is the way to go.
The time apart helps you both process the breakup, it stops further conflict between the two of you and it prevents you from sliding into being just friends, which is a BIG mistake if you want them back.
All that said, if you didn’t happen to see my videos on this topic and you opted to stay friends with your ex, this can actually be a good sign for your future together.
As I’ve said, being friends with your ex is a bad strategy if you’re hoping to get back together, but the fact that you had a strong enough bond that you COULD be friends is a sign that you two may have a future together down the line.
The opposite are those relationships that end suddenly and a week later you feel no connection to the other person and it’s almost like the relationship never happened. I’m sure you can think of people from your past that you can’t believe you even dated, much less were in a serious relationship with.
It doesn’t mean you don’t care about them and respect them, just that you two are SO different now that it almost seems like another lifetime. The truth is, people change over time and you can either grow together, or, more commonly, you can grow apart.
3. You haven’t given up hope
The truth is that a relationship doesn’t end when you break up, it ends when you stop trying to make it work. Now this point can come years before you two call it quits for good or it can happen months or years after you two have split.
The important thing is that if you can hold out hope that you two might have a future together then this is a sign that the two of you may be meant to be. Obviously if neither of you hope for a future where you’re back together then the chances of it happening spontaneously are pretty slim.
This is just to say that confidence is key in this situation. I wouldn’t advise you to disregard your ex’s wishes or to pester them into giving you a second chance.
Just hold on to that hope inside of you and use it to improve yourself and work towards a future where you two can be together. Because the moment you give up hope for good, is the moment you’ll know that you two have no future.
4. Your relationship had these FIVE things
Here’s something a little more concrete: a landmark study that was recently released by The National Academy of Sciences. This study used machine learning to analyze 43 datasets from 29 different laboratories across the US. This is a little dense but it basically boils down to this:
There are five different aspects of any relationship that predict success in the long run. Those aspects are:
- Perceived partner commitment: you felt like your partner was committed to you for the long haul, and vice versa.
- Appreciation: you and your partner both felt and SHOWED appreciation for the other person.
- Sexual satisfaction: You were able to maintain a happy and healthy sex life.
- Perceived partner satisfaction: you knew your partner was happy and vice versa.
- Conflict: you were able to handle conflict in a way that brought you closer together rather than drove you apart.
Think about your relationship. How well did it do in these categories? Obviously perceived partner commitment has taken a hit recently, since you broke up, but if your relationship was otherwise healthy, then it seems to me that you two are meant to be.
Because there are plenty of long-lasting relationships that are lacking in EVERY one of these areas. Remember these moving forward and, if you are lucky enough to get a second chance, make sure that you put in the work to fulfill these five areas.
5. You scored a 70 or above on my free quiz
If you scored 70 or above on my quiz, you’ve got a very good chance of getting back together with your ex either now or in the future. If you scored 60 or below… not so much. Either way, your results come with advice that’s tailored to your specific situation.
I’ve put all my experience as a breakup coach into creating this quiz. It’s completely free, it only takes five minutes, and it’s 100% confidential.
6. You two have powerful physical attraction
One unfortunate fact of long term relationships is that attraction fades over time. This is why we stop feeling butterflies when we see that other person once we’ve been together for awhile. This is perfectly normal.
As you get to know each other better, these feelings turn into a deeper, more secure form of love. So the more powerful your attraction starting out, the better your connection will be in the long run.
Attraction is foundational to any romantic relationship and if you’re not attracted to one another, I’m sorry to say but things just aren’t meant to be.
There are plenty of ways to foster attraction between you and another person. Something as simple as flirting can work wonders to create that spark that’s missing.
And you can always focus on losing weight, improving your body, and improving your appearance. This will not only make you more attractive, but it will help you feel more confident which will compound this effect.
And if you found that attraction was starting to fade in a relationship, the truth is that a breakup can actually help light those fires all over again. Because the more time you spend together, the more used to this other person you become.
No matter how good looking the two of you are, if you spend too much time together, they will eventually become familiar, and unexciting. Now that you’re apart, you truly have a chance to miss one another.
This means when you meet again, you’ll feel that electric charge you felt when you first saw one another. If this pull is strong enough, then it means that the two of you really are meant to be.
7. Your breakup was extremely tough
Sometimes it takes a breakup to make us realize what we had in the first place. If your breakup has been really difficult to deal with, if you find that you can’t eat, you can’t sleep, and you can’t get your mind off things, even weeks or months later, then this is a sign that the two of you are meant to be.
If you’re experiencing a huge sense of loss and it feels like you can’t go on, this is your mind telling you that what you had was really special and that it’s not really over, despite what may have happened between you.
On the other hand, if you felt a huge sense of relief after your breakup and you realize that you don’t miss them like you thought you would, then this is a sign that moving on is going to be the best option for you.
8. They made you the best version of yourself
Some people say that your partner should push you to improve yourself and reach your goals. Others say that your partner should bring you comfort and let you truly be yourself. I think that both are true.
Someone you’re meant to be with will allow you to be the best version of yourself. So if your partner made you feel supported and comfortable but also free to pursue your hopes and dreams, then you’ve found a keeper and someone you should stay with for the long haul.
If you’re not sure whether you feel this way, then chances are you don’t. Because once you feel this feeling, you’ll know that it’s the real deal and you’ll do anything to make it last forever.