Is your ex being too stubborn to admit that they want you back?
One of the most common questions I get is, “I know my ex wants me back, but they’re just too stubborn to admit it – how do I get them to admit that they want me back?”
And to this question, I always ask the following…
“How do you know your ex is being stubborn?”
“How do you know that your ex actually wants you back?”
Keep reading or watch the video below to find out!
Is Your Ex Being Stubborn or Are They Just Over It?
See, what happens with some of my clients is that they’ll trick themselves into thinking that their ex actually wants them back… then they’ll overanalyze their situation and try and come up with solutions to get their exes back.
But through my experience helping thousands of people around the world to win their ex back, I can tell you that this almost never works.
When my clients try and solve their relationship issues on their own, they usually end up jeopardizing their chances of ever getting their exes back, and I’m left to help them deal with the unfortunate aftermath.
And this is especially true in the case of a stubborn ex boyfriend or girlfriend.
RELATED: Does My Ex Want Me Back?
How Not To Treat A Stubborn Ex
You shouldn’t be prodding your ex with questions about why they’re making the decision they’re making… or why they don’t want you back.
This sort of behaviour totally comes across as needy and desperate… and you will only push your ex further and further away from you if you do this.
The fact that you KNOW they’re stubborn about getting back together with you is a bad sign.
That being said, some people are just stubborn in nature, period. I know I am… and my wife definitely knows it as well too! So maybe you’ve always known your ex to refuse to change their minds even when they’re backed into a corner – maybe they are simply one of those super stubborn personality types.
These people are extremely hard to get back, but it is possible. I’ll tell you exactly how.
Start With No Contact
Step one is the same as it is with any ex. In fact, it’s more important the more stubborn your ex is. You need to cut off al. Have you ever dealt with someone extremely stubborn? Do you know what happens when you try to convince a stubborn person that they’re wrong? THEY PUSH BACK.
And the harder you push, the more stubborn they become. This game never has a good outcome, so the best thing to do, for now, is to steer clear of them for now.
RELATED: “I Miss My Ex So Much”
See, directly after a breakup, your ex is probably experiencing a myriad of emotions – loneliness, depression, anger, and in your case, stubbornness. They have made a decision to break up with you and they are unwilling to open up to you, no matter what.
In order for them to eventually be open to the idea of communicating with you, you MUST let their emotions fade, and this only happens if you engage in No Contact.
But I know what a lot of you are thinking, “Well, Brad… if I honestly know for a FACT that my ex wants me back, why wouldn’t I try to at least convince him/her to give our relationship another shot?”
Well, for a few reasons…
Like I said, the harder you push to convince someone their wrong, the more damage you might be doing to your relationship. I mean, put yourself in their shoes for a minute…
Would you want someone constantly pestering you about something you just don’t want to talk about?
It can be extremely annoying, right?
So while you may think that you could convince your ex, now is not the time.
Second, even IF your ex wants you back, No Contact will work wonders in convincing your ex to give your relationship another shot.
Put it this way: have you ever lost an object you really cared about… like a cell phone or wallet? And do you remember how badly you wanted that item back, that you were willing to jump through all of these hoops just to get it?
What No Contact does is instil that sort of psychological effect inside your ex’s mind. Once you do this (and along with a bunch of other psychological strategies that I teach), your ex will be willing to crawl over broken glass just to get you back.
So without any further BS, I’m going to talk about the top 6 tips that you can use right now to make sure that your stubborn ex boyfriend or girlfriend comes flying back into your arms for good.
6 Tips To Get Your Stubborn Ex Back
1.) What you have to do in this situation is to make your ex FEEL like they’re in the control.
You have to allow your ex to feel like they’re dictating what’s happening between you two.
You need to convince your ex to come back on their OWN volition.
The harder you press a stubborn ex to change their mind, the more “dug in” they’ll want to be and the MORE they’ll resist your advances.
So what you need to do is exhibit what I call “External Behaviours”. That means you have to do things in your life that don’t directly involve your ex.
I know, this doesn’t sound like the advice you want to hear… after all, how do you get your ex back if you’re not talking to them or interacting with them? But trust me when I say that getting a stubborn ex is as much about what you do with your external life as it is about initiating conversations with him or her.
This means that you need to get your life in order.
Your stubborn ex isn’t going to want to take you back if they know you’re depressed, sad, and broken about the breakup. BUT… they WILL want to take you back if they see that you’re living your best life.
That means you’re happy, you have a lot of friends, you’re dating around, you’re going to the gym, and you’re getting out and doing what you’re passionate about.
There are a number of ways you can show this off to your ex… one of them being Facebook or any social media platform. But you can also use mutual friends as a subtle messenger.
For eg., set up a coffee date with an especially gossipy friend and watch as they spread the news to everyone about your amazing life…including your ex! Doing this can work wonders for you.
Just remember, getting your “stubborn” ex back isn’t about FORCING them to make a decision to take you back… it’s more about THEM coming to that conclusion all on their own.
2. Don’t Try To Force A Relationship With Your Ex
Again, you need to make them feel that they’re coming back to YOU and not the other way around. The more you beg and plead for your ex to come back to you, the more stubborn your ex will get. It’s the same dealing with all stubborn people. I know this totally sounds counterintuitive – after all, this tactic always works in Hollywood movies, right?
Well this strategy couldn’t be more wrong in real life. What you’ve been taught in books and movies is actually the complete OPPOSITE of what you should be doing. You shouldn’t wear your heart on your sleeve and pour your guts out – at least not yet.
Remember, we’re dealing with someone who’s stubborn, so before you try and convince them of anything, you need to PROVE to them that you’re worth coming back to. And I’ll share some tips on how to do this later in this video.
3. Give Your Ex The Space They Need
Again, I’ve talked about No Contact here… but I really need to emphasize this… especially when they’re stubborn… you need to stop asking “how long is it going to take to get my ex back?”
The truth is that you’re not going to change their minds overnight, no matter what. In fact, the more stubborn they are, usually the more time it takes for them to allow their feelings to change.
This could take weeks or maybe even months, but you NEED to allow them this time for their convictions to settle. Only then will they be vulnerable enough for you to take him or her back.
So how will you know when you’ve given your ex enough space? Usually I say that you need to give your ex 30 days of the “silent treatment” before reaching out to him or her.
For a particularly stubborn ex, I would increase this No Contact period to about 45 days.
This isn’t an exact science, unfortunately… and every situation is indeed different. So if you feel like your situation is unique and in need of some help, I encourage to sign up for my coaching program! My coaching program is INSANELY affordable so you don’t have to break your bank to hire me.
4. Set A Meeting
At some point after the No Contact Period of radio silence, you’re going to want to set up a meet with your ex.
At this stage of the interaction, you’re going to want to INDIRECTLY attract your ex back. Again, you can’t make it known you’re ACTIVELY trying to get your ex back, otherwise his or her stubbornness will kick in and you’ll be back to square one.
No, what you want to do is drop SUBTLE yet POWERFUL hints that you’re a far more attractive, fun, and well put together person now. Basically, you want to impress the shit out of them without them even knowing it!
You can do this by incorporating what I call “Value Stories” – these are subtle yet powerful stories that exhibit a ton of sexual and emotional value. Once your ex hears enough of these sorts of stories, they’ll want to come back to you… even despite their reservations before.
Don’t believe me? Try it out!
5. Rebuild A Sexual Connection
Remember, subtly is the name of the game here. You’re not going to get your ex back by kicking in the door and pushing your agenda on them. You’re going to have to utilize SUBTLE, psychological tools and tricks to make your ex to come running back to you.
And one of the most powerful ways to do this is to build sexual attraction.
That means you’re going to have to FLIRT with your ex.
First, remember to make solid eye contact and laugh at their jokes. Do your best to find reasons to get close to him or her… and, when the opportunity arises, touch your ex playfully on the elbow or arm. Don’t be afraid to playfully tease your ex too.
Confidence is the name of the game here when it comes to flirting… and once you nail this tip, your ex will be putty in your hands… even if they’re super stubborn.
6. Build EMOTIONAL Attraction
Making your stubborn ex come back to you isn’t just about sex. It’s also about building that inner connection with them and giving them that warm, fuzzy feeling everyone keeps talking about.
But you have a huge ace up your sleeve in this department. How, you ask?
Because you already know your ex really well.
You know the stories that make them tick. You know the memories that give THEM those warm and fuzzy feelings. Maybe it was that time you went hiking up in the mountains… or maybe it was that trip to Greece. Or maybe it was that time you taught your ex how to play a song on the guitar.
This is an area that only YOU can master since they’re YOUR memories, but subtly reminding your stubborn ex of these nostalgic emotions will psychologically force your ex to fall back into your arms (and into your bed)… for good.